Beyond The Power Play

Beyond The Power Play: Navigating Control and Awareness

Yesterday I had a realization during an interaction that left me pondering the intricate dynamics of control.

I found myself engaging with someone who communicated with a frustrating vagueness. At first, my instinctive reaction was one of resistance and a desire to assert control. But then, a shift occurred. Instead of reacting, I took a step back and observed the situation through a lens of awareness.

Understanding control

In that moment, I understood something essential: vagueness and confusion can often be tools for control. When someone is unclear, they create a space of uncertainty that can be manipulated to their advantage. My initial response was to reject this, to fight for my own control. Yet, a deeper wisdom emerged, inviting me to see beyond the surface.

Access Manipulation 101

This experience reminded me of the principles I facilitate in my specialty class, Access Manipulation 101. We explore the subtleties of human interactions, recognizing the underlying agendas and control mechanisms at play. More importantly, we learn how to transcend these dynamics with awareness and grace.

Shifting perspectives

Rather than viewing the interaction as a battleground, I began to see it as a play – not one of dominance, but of awareness. By acknowledging the other person’s attempt to control, I could choose to remain centered and composed. I didn’t need to react or reject; I could simply be aware.

Transforming the experience

This approach transforms the entire experience. Instead of getting entangled in a power struggle, I became an observer, a participant who engages with intention and insight. The need for control dissipated, replaced by a sense of empowerment that comes from within.

Mastering responses

In this newfound space, I realized that true control is not about dominating others but about mastering our own responses. It’s about acknowledging the games people play and choosing to engage from a place of awareness and strength. When we do this, we elevate the interaction and ourselves.

Invitation to awareness 

So… When you encounter someone trying to control you through vagueness or manipulation, pause. Take a breath. Observe. See the situation for what it is and choose to respond with clarity and grace. This is not about rejecting the game but about playing it with wisdom and poise.


Life offers us so many opportunities to learn and grow from our interactions. By staying aware and centered, we can navigate these experiences with a sense of playfulness and empowerment. Control is an inner state, a reflection of our own awareness and presence.

So I would like to share with you this invitation: Step into your power with grace, embrace each interaction as a chance to gain awareness, no matter what situation you’re in.


Kalpana Raghuraman

Kalpana Raghuraman is an advanced facilitator with the modality Access Consciousness, a published author and scholar. She is also artistic director of her own dance company, Kalpanarts.